Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Existential Ramblings

birds
 
"You strike me as someone in searching."
 
Well... shit. I have been struggling to digest my feelings about this. I often feel as though my life were in constant motion. Most likely because it is. I came across a painting of an admired artist. Boldly displayed across the over-sized canvas it reads: "SHIT. DON'T. STOP." I immediately connected to it. While Sam did not connect with the piece the way I did, he admitted that he liked the idea of displaying profanity in the house with the excuse of calling it art. I wanted to smack him and kiss him simultaneously. A familiar reaction. There have been so many times this year when I have begged, yearned, for things to slow down. They wouldn't. I felt forced to grieve while running. I noticed that my Love of yoga was largely aligned with more physically challenging forms of it. I found it to be most congruent with my life: painful, taxing, vitalizing, inspired, beautiful, and calming when I could find my breath and flow to it. It somehow manages to work. I find myself in the chaos. It occurs to me that we are all in search of meaning-filled lives. Am I simply more overt in my approach? I remain doubtful. I am largely aware of the power one's life holds, its fleeting nature, and my sense of responsibility to honor it. As I contemplate the coming year I question. What to do with it next...
 
My ramblings as late. My empathy to my fellow life finders and seekers.
 
With Love,
 

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